Imaginem un porter de futbol que es queixa perquè els davanters de l'equip contrari xuten amb molta potència i control. Tindria l'excusa perfecta per justificar els gols que encaixés. "És que són massa bons per a mi; jo no hi puc fer res".
Imaginem ara el mateix porter, davant dels mateixos davanters, que decideix llançar-se a aturar tot el que pugui aturar. Ja ha fet el primer pas, que és acceptar la realitat i respondre-hi.
Què passa si els davanters marquen molts gols? El porter pot decidir que ha fracassat, que no serveix per a això. Que no hi ha res a fer. Però també pot acceptar que, en aquesta ocasió, els altres han estat superiors, i que repassarà el vídeo del partit per aprendre'n un mica més. Potser llavors s'adoni que ha fet algunes bones aturades, un parell d'estirades que ni ell mateix creia que podria fer. Potser s'adona que la cosa hagués pogut anar molt pitjor i que, sobretot, la següent anirà millor.
Acceptar no significa necessàriament quedar-nos quiets, sense fer-hi res. Acceptar és alliberar-nos del victimisme que genera pensar que tot és culpa de l'altre. Acceptar és el primer pas per donar resposta al que ens passa. Acceptar no és només "tolerar", "aguantar-se".
Des de l'acceptació trobem dins nostre les habilitats per respondre al que ens passa. Som "respons-hàbils". Som responsables. Que és, d'alguna manera, el contrari de ser víctimes. Des de l'acceptació es construeix la responsabilitat.
El porter responsable diu "com que m'enfronto als millors davanters, estaré atent a tots els seus moviments". El porter víctima només es pregunta "per què sempre m'ha de tocar a mi enfrontar-me als millors?", mentre la pilota va entrant una vegada i una altra.
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Imagine a goalkeeper who complains because forwards make strong and accurate shoots. He would have an excuse to justify the goals. "they are too good for me; I can't do anything"
Now imagine that the same goalkeeper, facing the same forwards, decides to do his job and try to stop every shoot . In this case, he has made the first step, which is to accept the reality and respond to it .
What if the forwards score many goals? The goalkeeper may decide that he has failed, that he is unable to do his job. There is nothing to do. But he can also accept that, on this occasion, they were better, and that he will see the video of the game to learn something else. Maybe then he realizes he has made some good blocks indeed. Maybe he realizes that things could have been much worse and that next game will be better.
Acceptance does not necessarily mean to stay still, without doing anything . Acceptance is to get rid of the victimism that lies under the assumption that "it is others' fault". It is the first step to give a response to whatever happen. It is not just "tolerate".
After acceptance we are ready to find inside ourselves the abilities to respond to what happens. We become "response-ables". We are responsible. Which is, somehow, the opposite of being a victim. Acceptance is the foundation of responsibility.
The responsible goalkeeper says "since I am facing the best forwards, I will be attentive to their every move". The victim goalkeeper asks one question all the time: "Why do I always have to face the best ones?" and, meanwhile, the ball goes into the goal again and again.
Imaginem ara el mateix porter, davant dels mateixos davanters, que decideix llançar-se a aturar tot el que pugui aturar. Ja ha fet el primer pas, que és acceptar la realitat i respondre-hi.
Què passa si els davanters marquen molts gols? El porter pot decidir que ha fracassat, que no serveix per a això. Que no hi ha res a fer. Però també pot acceptar que, en aquesta ocasió, els altres han estat superiors, i que repassarà el vídeo del partit per aprendre'n un mica més. Potser llavors s'adoni que ha fet algunes bones aturades, un parell d'estirades que ni ell mateix creia que podria fer. Potser s'adona que la cosa hagués pogut anar molt pitjor i que, sobretot, la següent anirà millor.
Acceptar no significa necessàriament quedar-nos quiets, sense fer-hi res. Acceptar és alliberar-nos del victimisme que genera pensar que tot és culpa de l'altre. Acceptar és el primer pas per donar resposta al que ens passa. Acceptar no és només "tolerar", "aguantar-se".
Des de l'acceptació trobem dins nostre les habilitats per respondre al que ens passa. Som "respons-hàbils". Som responsables. Que és, d'alguna manera, el contrari de ser víctimes. Des de l'acceptació es construeix la responsabilitat.
El porter responsable diu "com que m'enfronto als millors davanters, estaré atent a tots els seus moviments". El porter víctima només es pregunta "per què sempre m'ha de tocar a mi enfrontar-me als millors?", mentre la pilota va entrant una vegada i una altra.
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Imagine a goalkeeper who complains because forwards make strong and accurate shoots. He would have an excuse to justify the goals. "they are too good for me; I can't do anything"
Now imagine that the same goalkeeper, facing the same forwards, decides to do his job and try to stop every shoot . In this case, he has made the first step, which is to accept the reality and respond to it .
What if the forwards score many goals? The goalkeeper may decide that he has failed, that he is unable to do his job. There is nothing to do. But he can also accept that, on this occasion, they were better, and that he will see the video of the game to learn something else. Maybe then he realizes he has made some good blocks indeed. Maybe he realizes that things could have been much worse and that next game will be better.
Acceptance does not necessarily mean to stay still, without doing anything . Acceptance is to get rid of the victimism that lies under the assumption that "it is others' fault". It is the first step to give a response to whatever happen. It is not just "tolerate".
After acceptance we are ready to find inside ourselves the abilities to respond to what happens. We become "response-ables". We are responsible. Which is, somehow, the opposite of being a victim. Acceptance is the foundation of responsibility.
The responsible goalkeeper says "since I am facing the best forwards, I will be attentive to their every move". The victim goalkeeper asks one question all the time: "Why do I always have to face the best ones?" and, meanwhile, the ball goes into the goal again and again.
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